Confessions of China Living

I wish someone had told me, before I moved to Shanghai last year, to be careful to not let China make me a meaner person. I had thought that I had adjusted well. I had learned the width of the narrowest opening between two people that I could weave through on a crowded city street. I learned to accept the smaller dimensions of personal space here, but not give it up for the obnoxious, privileged young Shanghainese women who will cut you in line. I learned not to cross at crosswalks and how to judge the likelihood of a car hitting me by its distance from and the speed at which it is going. I accepted the fact that horns were going to blare at 3am, and have even begun to be able to sleep without earplugs.

I learned to survive, but I mistook my accumulated survival skills as signs of my emerging cosmopolitanism. This is what it is to be an urbanite! I thought. I am tough-skinned, competent, and worldly!

But in actuality, I was slammed by the thrice-as-forceful wave of post-graduate life, city life, and Chinese life all at once. I can't separate the three, can't ever figure out whether my feelings and frustrations are the natural reactions of a newly minted independent adult, those of a space-and-quiet-loving girl whose prior contact with cities up till now had been day trips into New York and Philly, or the result of coming to a Chinese city.

I no longer want to deny it, no longer want to cover it up with euphemisms. China is impatient and judgmental and unforgiving, and in my struggle to survive here, I've absorbed a lot of that into myself.

It's easy to internalize a lot of frustration in China. That's what happens to a society led by a government that doesn't allow freedom of speech. It only takes one bus ride in Shanghai to get a pretty thorough gist of what makes me angry here. As the bus pulls to the curb, middle-aged men and single-minded young mothers push shuffling old women out of the way to be the first onto the bus. The bus drivers slams the doors shut as soon as you step on board, barely avoiding catching the back of your shirt in its wheezy path. Slouching young men with artfully arranged bangs sit in the courtesy seats and bury their heads in their iPhones or iPads, determinedly ignoring the thin-wristed, white-haired little old ladies who cling to the side of their seats and struggle to stand upright as the bus driver lurches in and out of traffic with his hand permanently pressed against the horn. The man desperately missing his sixteenth cigarette of the day on his short bus journey groans and shudders and jerks his head and hacks up a thick gob of spit into the single, tiny, overflowing trash can. Oh, traffic lights? A mere suggestion. The thing that counts down the seconds until your light turns green? Obviously an indication that traffic is supposed to go when there are still 4 seconds left of the red light to go. If you get to your stop and the bus is crowded, which is often, it becomes a game of push and shove, see how many people you can bang with your overstuffed purse on your way to reach the door. The concept of letting people off the public transport vehicle before new passengers board? A mere concept, rarely put into practice.

A trip on Shanghai's public transportation illustrates the selfishness and inconsideration of a nation that adopted capitalism while still held in the thrall of communism. Knowing this, everything in China becomes suspect. The smiling, well-made-up waitress who serves you at dinner may be secretly resenting your white-collar job and accompanying salary. You buy a cheap watery beer for 40RMB at a pub that tries to evoke European legacies and feel guilty that your one beer could feed for one whole day one of the many beggars, often deformed or missing limbs from factory accidents, who sit in the streets. You become suspicious of every price given to you at the local market, wondering if the seller isn't trying to gyp you out of a few more yuan despite his already reasonably low price. Silence does not indicate contentment, but rather decades of pent-up frustration at inequality and corruption.

No community is perfect, but I never thought that I'd lose so many of the things I used to like about myself--listening skills, objectivity, concentrated kindness--so quickly, in this environment. It took almost a year's worth of unhappiness and regretful meanness on my part for me to realize that I don't like much of who I've become. So, starting now, I will strive to be more aware of when I'm being mean, and to resist the easy temptation of sliding into meanness. I will also write more about China, my travels, and my thoughts here. I haven't written as much about my life abroad as I had expected to mostly because I'm really unhappy with many things about it. But if writing about it will be my catharsis, then I'm going to. I'm going to put the truth out there, because I'm still an American citizen, I'm still a reluctant leader of humanity, and the truth cannot be denied.

Review: Fifty Shames of Earl Grey by Fanny Merkin

Tags: humor, parody, BDSM

Summary

Soon-to-be-college graduate Anna Steal meets the irresistibly sexy, rich, handsome, suave, and nerdy Earl Grey and gets swept away in a romance beyond her imagination. The sex and presents may be great, but Earl Grey has some deep dark things that he is ashamed about, which can threaten their chances of staying together forever.

Review

FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY was at its best when it scathingly critiqued the (many) flaws of Fifty Shades of Grey and E. L. James’ writing. Alas, FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY enjoyed itself too much too often, and the liberties it took with plot, characterization, and humor ultimately weakened my overall enjoyment of the book.

FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY has an arguably unlimited source of material to parody, and that’s what it does best. I giggle-snorted the most when Merkin/Shaffer laid bare the utterly ridiculous inelegance of James’ writing.

On meaningless descriptions:

“I gaze into his gazing eyes gazingly like a gazelle gazing into another gazelle’s gazing gaze.” 

“We step inside the cabin and he turns the lights on. Wow. What a place. There are so many things, like couches and chairs and tables.” 

“It doesn’t seem fair that one man could be so beautiful, and so talented, and so rich, but damn: Earl Grey is the total package. My inner guidette shakes her head. That’s like the fiftieth time you’ve said that, using nearly the exact same words, she says.” 

On using physical qualities to repeatedly characterize “her” characters:

“I watch as he pulls his credit card out of his wallet using his long fingers, which I swear have to be longer than his forearms.” 

On illogical progressions in story events:

“’I’m kind of glad you crashed into the ocean,’ Earl says.
‘And why is that, Mr. Grey?’
‘Because I’m throwing a masked charity ball tonight, and I’d love for you to come with me.’” 

On Christian Grey’s creepiness/unrealisticness/unattractiveness:

“He’s just too good looking to say no to. I can’t quit him, even if I tried. Mostly because he would stalk me to the ends of the earth, but still.” 

“’You’re doing so much good in the world, Mr. Grey,’ I tell him.
‘It’s to balance out the cruelty in my own heart,’ he says grimly.
I don’t say anything, because there’s no use arguing with Earl Grey when he’s PMSing.” 

On the transparency of Fifty Shades of Grey being Twilight fanfiction:

“Earl is only six years older than me, but sometimes the gulf between our ages seems like something I can’t bridge. It’s like he’s a 104-year-old vampire in a twenty-seven-year-old’s body.” 

So yeah, the book has some great biting lines about FSoG being an utter piece of crap. But, as I mentioned, it’s one thing to parody and criticize the original material’s ridiculousness, it’s another to add your own kind of ridiculousness. The liberties that FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY took with content left me mostly unmoved. For instance, Earl Grey has a love for Tom Cruise that shows up in the form of multiple movie references. Shaffer explains this as being a running gag, but it didn’t do anything for me. Neither did Jin’s (Anna’s “ethnic friend,” ahaha poking fun at token minorities as “diversity” in literature) bronyism, Katherine’s alcoholism, or “Triassic Park.”

On Ana/Anna’s idiocy:

“Once I graduate, I’m going to start looking for a ‘real’ job. I don’t have anything lined up yet, but I’m not one to worry. In this economy, it shouldn’t be too hard for a fresh college graduate to find a new job.” 

“I feel naked before him, mostly because I don’t have any clothes on.” 

“Less than a minute later, there’s a reply from Earl Grey. Somebody clearly wasn’t busy enough.” 

Actually, that last line illustrates another of the head-shaking things about EARL GREY: Anna Steal has a better head on her shoulders her counterpart. Ana Steele was too stupid in a blank, wish fulfillment kind of way for the author and susceptible readers; Anna Steal was over-the-top stupid (and also, might I add, cringe-inducingly horny), but she also hits it spot-on with her character analyses of Earl Grey. Such insight does not belong to Ana/Anna’s character; the fact that it does in FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY makes readers wonder why she felt she deserved Earl Grey when she clearly deserved better than him.

My favorite lines from the book:

“He’s a nice guy. Like Mark Zuckerberg, only less autistic.” 

“’Look, the point is, there are plenty of ponies in the sea.’
‘Yeah, and they’re called “seahorses,”’ Jin says, sulking. 

And the utter truth about FSoG, spoken about Anna (which, again, makes her smarter than her counterpart ever was):

“’You act like there’s something wrong with you, like everything you enjoy is embarrassing or scary. News flash, Mr. Grey: This isn’t 1950 or whatever. Your sexual tastes aren’t as shocking or as deviant as you think. Neither is anything else you like. Maybe if you didn’t take your fifty shames so seriously, I wouldn’t be so compelled to laugh at them.’” 

Over and out.

Da Capo Press / July 31, 2012 / Paperback / 224pp. / $13.99

e-galley received for review from publisher and NetGalley.

Author Interview with Sarah Beth Durst

Sarah Beth Durst has been a steady fixture on the YA fantasy scene for the past few years. Her latest is VESSEL, is recently out from Margaret K. McElderry. Us PoC book lovers have been dedicatedly keeping an eye on this book for a while, thanks in large part to the breath-stealing cover:

And this alluring book synopsis:

In a desert world of sandstorms and sand-wolves, a teen girl must defy the gods to save her tribe in this mystical, atmospheric tale from the author of Drink, Slay, Love.

Liyana has trained her entire life to be the vessel of a goddess. The goddess will inhabit Liyana’s body and use magic to bring rain to the desert. But Liyana’s goddess never comes. Abandoned by her angry tribe, Liyana expects to die in the desert. Until a boy walks out of the dust in search of her.

Korbyn is a god inside his vessel, and a trickster god at that. He tells Liyana that five other gods are missing, and they set off across the desert in search of the other vessels. For the desert tribes cannot survive without the magic of their gods. But the journey is dangerous, even with a god’s help. And not everyone is willing to believe the trickster god’s tale.

The closer she grows to Korbyn, the less Liyana wants to disappear to make way for her goddess. But she has no choice: She must die for her tribe to live. Unless a trickster god can help her to trick fate—or a human girl can muster some magic of her own.

Today, I have Sarah Beth Durst as a guest on my blog to talk more about herself and VESSEL, hooray!

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1. Your cover has a beautiful POC model on it, and that is a total deal-maker for me! Can you tell us a bit about the type of research you had to do for VESSEL, and which cultures, if any, you drew upon for it? What was the most surprising thing you learned in your research?

I researched the lives and cultures of people who live in deserts, specifically the Sahara, the Gobi, and the southwest United States. And I meshed them together and injected them with magic to create my desert world.

A few things I learned: Snakes can stay venomous for twenty-four hours after death. You can eat a scorpion raw (if you cut off the tail). And date palm trees have bark that you can climb, but the bark is also sharp enough to cut you.

2. What was the hardest part of VESSEL to write? What was your favorite part?

I loved creating the world, especially inventing the mythology. (Oral storytelling plays an important part in the culture of my desert land.) The hardest part for me is always the first draft, when the story is the farthest from what it's supposed to be. I love revisions because, for me, that's when the story comes to life.

3. Give us a snapshot of A Day in the Life of Sarah Beth Durst, Writer.

Every morning I wake at the crack of dawn to feed the fire-breathing dragons, then I have to muck out the centaur stables and check on the were-chickens in between writing a few paragraphs...

Okay, I don't really wake at the crack of dawn. But otherwise, it's fairly accurate. My day is a constant mix of writing and daily life. I do my best to balance both.

4. You're stranded on an island. Would you rather do it on your own (Robinson Crusoe-style) or with a group of strangers (Lord of the Flies-style?)

If the island has its own library, then alone is fine. If not... then I suppose I'll take my chances with the people. Aside from being able to type fast, I don't have many survival skills so it would be nice to have other people... at least until they decide I'm Piggy.

5. What is your favorite thing to do after a good writing session?

Collapse on the couch with my husband and a bag of tortilla chips! I'd like to say something a lot more exotic, such as "after I finish writing, I head off to skydive, followed by a snorkeling expedition and a hunt for the Loch Ness Monster," but really, I just like to watch Project Runway then go to sleep.

mongolia-travel-advice.com

milk-and-pumpkin.blogspot.com

6. Complete the following sentences:

- Fans of Tamora Pierce, Robin McKinley, and Kristin Cashore will enjoy VESSEL.

- When reading VESSEL, readers should prepare date pastries and goat cheese on pita bread as their snacks.

- After reading VESSEL, readers will never be able to think of sand in the same way again.

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Thank you, Sarah! Be sure to check Sarah out at her author website, Twitter, and Facebook. Remember, VESSEL is out now from booksellers!

Review: Shadowfell by Juliet Marillier

Shadowfell, Book 1

Tags: YA, fantasy, romance, fairies

Summary

On the run from the dreaded Enforcers of the king of Alban’s terrifying rule, 16-year-old Neryn has no one left. Her only option is to travel north to a place called Shadowfell, where rebellion against King Keldec is rumored to be brewing. Shadowfell may be the only place Neryn can be safe…for she holds a rare, magical talent that the king is determined to destroy…or, even worse, possess.

Review

I write this review from the point of view of a Juliet Marillier fan who, shamefully, has only read a handful of her books (so far!). SHADOWFELL, the first book in her new YA fantasy series, may not be as canonical as some of her other works, but it is still a solidly good fantasy read that will please fantasy and non-fantasy readers alike.

SHADOWFELL’s strengths lie, strangely enough, in its great use of common fantasy tropes. Say what? But you hate tropes, Steph! Yeah, well, sometimes you just need a story in your favorite genre with a bit of feel-good predictability. SHADOWFELL does that primarily with its straightforward quest plot, angelic heroine, and simmering romance.

The primary thing that Neryn does in this story is walk…all the way…to her destination. Rather than be bored, however, I was fully engrossed in the many adventures she encountered along the way: the people she talked to, the Folk she befriended, the constant tense threat of encroaching Enforcers. Marillier doesn’t spend too much prose describing the landscape of Alban, but you know enough to envision Neryn traversing dark forests thick with thousand-year-old trees, bleak rocky landscapes, and mountain ridges with the sharp autumn wind conspiring to push her off the edge of the world. Neryn may only do one thing throughout SHADOWFELL, but the story purrs along in that smooth, pleasant way of good rides.

Neryn is a sympathetic heroine, despite her being almost too good to be true. As she unwittingly completes more and more of the “tests” that determine her (ahem) calling, she maintains a sort of golden-heartedness that seems only to exist in literature. Neryn follows her late grandmother’s mantra of “You always have something to give others” so carefully that some readers might be prone to rolling their eyes. Nevertheless, she makes for the perfect protagonist for a quest plot, as she encounters, and overcomes, a number of scenarios and obstacles.

Last—but certainly not least—we have what probably makes all of Marillier’s fantasies stand out the most: the romance. Huzzah, no insta-luv! Flint and Neryn’s attraction develops almost painfully slowly. Neither one of them had an upbringing that endears them to easily trusting others. Perhaps the thing I appreciated most in SHADOWFELL was how we readers, alongside Neryn, never knew whether or not we could trust Flint. That man sure walks the line between two sides so talently. The uncertainty of Flint’s loyalty adds a refreshing uncertainty to this literary romance.

SHADOWFELL probably doesn’t break any new grounds in fantasy, but it’s the sort of story that could’ve easily gone wrong at the hands of a less talented author. Marillier fans, this book may not be your new Marillier favorite, but it is worth your time. And as SHADOWFELL’s voice runs a little younger, this may be the perfect book to give to young readers who have received devoured all of Tamora Pierce’s books and are begging for more.

Similar Authors
Maria V. Snyder
Sherwood Smith
Tamora Pierce

Cover discussion: I am underwhelmed by this cover. The eye skips off it; there is nothing to hold one's attention.

Knopf / Sept. 11, 2012 / Hardcover / 416pp. / $16.99

e-galley received for review from publisher and NetGalley. Thank you!